I have a dream. I’ll bet you share it, too.
I have a dream that I could get to the place where I could experience a deep, sustaining joy… every day.
The kind of joy that isn’t touched by the challenges and storms of life.
Now, I am not naïve. There is no such thing as a happy pill that will make life all sunshine and smiles. I know that life can be difficult. I know the impact of circumstances will affect me until the day I die.
But, wouldn’t it be great if we were able to increase the frequency and experience of the “good days” and decrease the impact of the “bad days”?
Good news! There is. (more…)
There’s not a person out there who doesn’t want to improve their lives. It’s ingrained in us. We want to be the best that we can be.
Image by Rama V.
So why do so few of us actually take the needed steps
to improve our lives?
Much like anything else in life, I think the answer is we
overcomplicate what really needs to be done to be better.
We formulate grand schemes. We layout everything at once. We look at the big picture.
And then we get hit with the overwhelm.
Taking a look at the overall plan, we see no way to better ourselves.We become paralyzed with analysis paralysis.
Just like our answers should be simple, we can break down a better you through baby steps. Eventually, the baby steps will snowball into breakthrough.
To become a better you, try adding or beefing up these three actions to your life:
This quote has had a profoundly positive impact on me. In many ways, it changed my life.
“If you don’t like something, change it.
If you can’t change it, change your attitude about it.”
– Maya Angelou
I used to whine about EVERYTHING I didn’t like. Like a malignant Johnny Appleseed, I spread my complaints far and wide to all who would listen.
No wonder people didn’t want to be around me… except for fellow whiners.
Ironically, but not surprisingly, I didn’t always want to be around my fellow whiners. Somehow, I didn’t see the connection.
Here’s how all that changed…
Have you ever had a friend recommend something
that they thought was “awesome” or even report that they experienced a breakthrough?
It was something you were eager to try out… yet when
you did, you were underwhelmed?
Then, just about the time you are ready to assign “yah, right…” to then next “this was ah-mazing” claim, you are shocked because, well, it actually was.
Here’s the question: Why is it that, sometimes “great” promised claims turn out to be a bust, and other times they are, to use the word of the old Tony the Tiger commercial… GREAT!
And perhaps more importantly, how do you avoid two equally fatal mistakes:
- Falling for every grandiose claim, OR
- Turning into a cynical, skeptical critic (who misses out on some great things because you doubt everything).
Hero stories rise in unexpected situations
Dave Sanderson was on yet another flight (he flew over 100 times a year). Like clockwork, he knew what came next.
So, just like most of us do, he tuned out when they go over safety details at the beginning of the flight.
Yet this time the information would save a life. (more…)
Courtesy: Jen Cohen
Have you ever wondered, “Why am I working so hard but not seeing greater success?”
It is not an uncommon experience. You work really hard toward a goal, hoping to see greater success as time goes on. But, instead you experience frustration and disillusionment from coming up empty handed.
Why is it that some people see greater success from their efforts… and some don’t?
So here you are. Tired, annoyed,
disgruntled. You’ve been trying,
and trying, and trying some more.
You’ve worked overtime, spent months working on the same manuscript, endless nights with coffee and a night lamp to study for that one class. And still, nothing. Nada. Zilch.
Nothing to show for your hard work except the bags under your eyes and your dreary aura. You’re stuck in the grind zone. There’s no resolution in sight; all that’s laid out in front of you is more work, on top of more work, with some more work to top it all off.
Shouldn’t there be some reward… by now? Some encouragement, “you’ve made it this far, keep going!” At least some sense of, “halfway there!”
You remember the time you left the starting line on this dream of a better something. You thought to yourself, “Sure, it’ll take hard work and dedication, but it’ll be worth it when I accomplish this.”
But, now you aren’t so sure. The finish line is nowhere in sight. Should you even keep going?
Have you ever looked back on a conversation you had and thought, yeah, I definitely should have handled that better? Yep… me too.
A friend of mine told me of her recent regretful
“I called my daughter’s dad to set up a trip
for her to visit him. And he made a couple
of comments about the cost of the flight and
the dates not working for him.
I was instantly mad.
To my credit, I knew what was happening at the time. But like a car whose brakes go out, I couldn’t stop the wreck. I started shouting my “extremely valid” points and making snarky remarks.
With neither of us wanting to deal with each other at that point—we hung up. It was an epic fail.”
Have you ever been in a situation like this? You were able to identify that you were feeling emotional… but felt helpless to stop it?
The great news is that when you learn (yes, it is a process) how to better manage your emotions by raising your “emotional intelligence,” things turn out MUCH better.
Read on to discover 4 compelling benefits from increasing your emotional intelligence (EQ).
“EQ has twice the power of IQ to predict performance [success]. EQ is also a better predictor than employee skill, knowledge, or expertise.” – Gerald Mount
Try this experiment. Imagine something you fear, even dread happening to you. Something really bad. Go ahead… I’ll wait.
Now, imagine those worst fears actually happen this coming week. What would your life be like 6 months from now? A year later?
Now, it’s time for our experiment to go to your happy place. Imagine one of your “dreams come true” happening this coming week. What would your life be like 6 months from now? A year later?
Now, take both of those imagined futures, good and bad, and throw them out the window. They are dead wrong.
Here’s the problem: research has revealed that you and I have a mental distortion in our perception of the future.
It confirms we humans have a huge problem accurately predicting how certain events, good or bad, will impact us… especially how we will feel in the future because of them.
It gets worse. Your inability to accurately forecast your future quality of life based on the impact current events have on you is undermining the quality of your decisions and your life TODAY. Read on to learn what you can do about it.
Consistently making good decisions is not easy.
As a student of decision making, I have discovered LOTS of reasons you and I make lousy, or shall we say “less than optimum” decisions. I have undoubtedly experienced all of them many times over. You have, too.
There is one reason we need to talk about that is extremely frustrating to deal with… especially when others around you do it. So much so, that you are tempted to utter an F word.
This cause of poor decision making is also a 4-letter F word… FEAR.
If not addressed, fear will not only affect your decisions today but will also reduce your ability to improve your decision-making abilities in the future. Not good.