A secret desire for virtually every human being on this planet is to be seen as attractive by others. I’m not just talking about physical appearance, either.
Attractive [uh-trak-tiv]: A pleasing quality that draws people toward it.
We’d all love for others to be drawn to us like a magnet, to seek us out, to want to be with us, to hang on our words, laugh at our jokes… at least by the people we want to be with.
Can you relate?
We go to great lengths in a number of ways to accomplish this:
- Outer bodies: Botox, implants, makeup, personal grooming, working out, dieting, getting our hair/clothes just right, etc.
- Achievement: Leading to status, fame, or wealth (which attracts people)
- Personalities: People pleasing, being what we think others want us to be (chameleon syndrome) so they like us more.
What is usually overlooked are attractive qualities that radiate from the inside out. These character qualities can draw people toward us… or repel them from us.
Empathy is a powerful inner quality that can help you be a magnet that draws people toward you… and increases their desire to be in your orbit.
“If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from his angle as well as your own. ” – Henry Ford
Thankfully, this undervalued people skill can be increased in your life… opening many new doors to a meaningful life with tremendous impact.
Read on to learn 5 ways to improve your empathy skills… and 5 things NOT to do that you might think are helpful (trust me, they aren’t).
Do you desire/aspire to become a person that others are attracted to?
Do you want people to admire and respect you more (especially by the people that really matter)?
Then, you need an influential character trait that is in short supply these days. In fact, its disappearance in many societies is creating all sorts of problems… and is getting worse.
- Hindering personal growth
- Ruining interpersonal relationships
- Reducing innovation/progress
- Limiting our ability to solve major problems
What’s ironic is that the lack of this trait allows a poison cloud to develop that no one likes experiencing… but everyone still uses when it serves them.
The trait is called intellectual humility… and very few have it these days.
BTW- if you already think you know what it is (and are tempted to skip reading further), that is evidence you don’t possess it.
Here’s what I can promise you… If you can grow in this trait, you can accelerate your personal growth/success. Plus, you will dramatically improve both your relationships and your influence in this world.
Sometimes “little hinges swing big doors” in your life. They can have a disproportionately beneficial impact, considering how inconsequential they seem.
One scientifically verified example is found in the regular use of two simple words: Thank You.
As author Max Lucado reminds us–
Two essential words deserve special attention– “Thank you”
Gratitude is a mindful awareness of the benefits of life. It is the greatest of virtues.
Studies link it with a variety of positive effects. Grateful people tend to be– (more…)